What is this?

The lines are blurred
I feel what I feel
Have a hard time these days
Figuring out what is real

In your absence, alone
Your words seem so vacant
You return again and it changes
What you share is consuming

So much to lose, so I fight you
Though it drives you crazy
You keep coming back
And vow not to let me desert you

I know for certain the passion is fire
But is that all there is?

Beyond the curtains I feel your desire
But is there more to this?

You would have to be worth it
If I take the risk
We may sever old ties
That can't ever be fixed

We must take into account
What we're leaving behind
Once the tape has been played
It won't help to rewind

Let us take note of all that
Our actions may turn to waste
The casualties that result
When we act out in haste

With so much at stake
You are always so calm

Too determined to have me
You realize this is crazy?

This is really quite scary
How reckless and bold you can be
Especially the way you respond
When and wherever you see me

What is it about us
That keeps this thing flowing?

When the bottom falls out to expose us
Will you stand by me, or will you keep going?

Where I Wanna Be

Wouldn't mind living in SC
Residing in Cobb County
Not exactly the Cobb where I'd rather be

But SC is where I'd like to be
Decked out with his southern charm
Wrapped securely around me

Where on every day the grass is green
Blood pressure is good
And life is serene

Nights are like heaven descended
United at last
With my true love, SC

Look what you have done to me
Spoiled my tastebuds which long for thee
Teased my eyelids which flutter in glee
To rest my eyes upon SC

How can this be
My feet have not tread on the ground in SC
But once in a dream you visited me
Which is why I must find my way and be free

Am I In This Alone

It happened so fast, though he had a head start
He quickly carved out a place in my heart...

He was here and my focus was getting him out
He has gone away and I realize now
I cannot get him out of my mind

He needed to walk away from me
In order to do what was right
But now that he has I toss and turn each night

Something has happened I cannot explain
While I was not looking my heart filled with pain

The grieving began, and I could not eat
My meals were exchanged for a fantasy feast

Daydreams to help my heart to cope
Teasing my reservation and hope

Not seeing him for weeks has given me anxiety
To the extent I did not want to commune with society

I wanted to escape to a foreign place
Where we could meet and spend some time,
Escape the biting reality
That I am not his, and he is not mine

One day we met; we became
Star-crossed lovers by noon
And though we knew it had to end
I fear you've gone away too soon

You once asked me, "Am I in this alone?"

And without my consent

My heart became your home.

Heart Stands Still

I focused on pushing you away
Because it was the right thing to do

Hard to imagine why you disagree
Knowing we both belong to another

We met and you felt an instant connection
We became friends and our connection was mutual

In a matter of days things heated up between us
You became overwhelmed in my presence

Then felt the need to touch me
Your heart started racing and you kissed me

I was in awe of your response
It never should have happened

We parted, but your thoughts and feelings remained
The distance between us resulted in pain

While we were apart I realized I missed you
As an aching crept upon my chest

Anxiety consumed me as I imagined not seeing
You ever again, it was too much to bear

So I searched myself to find out why
It mattered to me so much

Then I recalled your gorgeous smile
And your tender touch

It was at that moment I longed for you
Considered that your feelings for me were true

But now what can become of this
My heart stands still

As we struggle to shelf our passion
In order to perform God's will.